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One of the days I had been dreading since diagnosed with cancer and the talk of treatment was the hair loss. As my friend, Andrea Kemp said in a recent Facebook post "A girl likes her hair. It makes her feel pretty." It does. I would joke about shaving my head or cutting it all off but I wasn’t serious. I like trying new styles. Let it grow out. Cut it all off. And most important, I was also using my hair as a way to cover up Tater.
After meeting with the oncology ARNP, I knew the chemo cocktail I was going to be on was going to make me lose my hair. I read on Pinterest all kinds of blogs on how to prepare for that moment. Do I let it just fall out? Do I shave my head? Do I get a wig? On November 16 I decided to take the first step in preparing for baldness. I got a haircut. I thought maybe if I just cut a little at a time, my niece and nephews wouldn't freak out at Aunt SuSu being bald 😂. My cousin Whitney accompanied me as my as emotional support to see the amazing Courtney Griggs at Revolution H. Honestly, I was a bundle of emotions during this time and was afraid I would have a complete meltdown on Courtney. Whitney was great at keeping my mind occupied.
I had my first chemo treatment on November 25. I recall the first nurse I met in chemo saying "You decide when you lose your hair. Don't let cancer." And, being a little bit of a control freak, I liked the idea of having control over this tiny part of my life. Cancer was making me bald, I figured I could, at least, decide when that would happen.
On December 5, I got another haircut to go a little shorter. Courtney is Uh-mazing!!!!! She was so supportive and kind. And just made me feel relaxed. I always look forward to getting my hair cut, so I was really sad when I left knowing that it was going to be my last cut for a while.
Up to this point, I had not noticed any hair loss. Then two days later, my scalp started aching and got a little worse each day. As the follicles start releasing the hair, it hurts. It feels like your hair has been in a really tight ponytail all day. (For you guys who don't put their hair in a ponytail, it's like someone pulling your hair at about a 50% pull constantly.) Then my scalp started hurting. And then it happened. While in the shower I reached up to wring my hair, and I came out with a wad of hair in my hands. Honestly, all I could do was stand there and cry. Then you sigh, shake it off and cry a little more.
I told Michael and my family....." it's time." December 11 we borrowed my brother-in-law‘s clippers and had a "head-shaving party". We had tacos and laughed and then we all went to the bathroom (thank goodness we have a big bathroom). I'm also one of those weirdos that wanted to see the hair go. Michael, bless his heart, started his task of shaving my head. We let Easton cut part of it. My biggest fear was my niece and nephews being scared of me with no hair. Ashton just shrugged and said my teacher had cancer it’s fine. Ava - 1 and a half, paid no attention. Easton didn’t care either.
I have joked many times about shaving my head. A friend (Thanks Nicki 🤣) reminded me that I use to say this all the time. And honestly, I would keep my head bald if I had the courage. But I digress.......
Hats became my best friends for a little bit. I would wear them when I went to treatment or went out in public. I found these perfect ones on Amazon. These had little buttons on them and can be worn slouchy. I would also tuck them in and make them a little tighter fitting.
These were my absolute favorite hats!!! I liked the variety of colors offered and because they were so soft. They are two pieces. A hat and a headband. I read many blogs that said their scalp was sensitive so keep that in mind with the fabric. I did not have any issues with scalp sensitivity.
As time went on and I went back to work, I started having hot flashes. I would have to rip the hat as quickly as I could and start fanning myself down before I burst into flames. I found myself apologizing to my patients for having a bald head. The sweetest thing happened and I realized it was okay to ditch the hats. My female patients were amazing. They repeatedly told me how beautiful I was without a hat. They encouraged me to be proud of the fight I had gone through. Within two weeks of returning to work, I was brave enough to go without the hats. LIBERATING!!!!
Wigs ...... I was gifted a beautiful wig by my aunt's hairstylist. He even dyed it to match my hair. When I tried it on it was so hot. With the hot flashes, there was no way that I could wear a wig. This is completely a personal decision. I cannot recommend any suggestions on shopping for a wig or any recommendations! BUT there are some excellent blogs on the web with some great tips. What I can say to those who choose no wig - ROCK-IT SISTER!!! It is amazing not having to worry about drying your hair. You wash your head and go. No worries about bed head, bad hair days, no hair in your eyes! And if you choose a wig - ROCK-IT SISTER!!!!
The regrowth has been fun to watch. As I mentioned earlier, I wish I was brave enough to keep my head shaved or at least buzzed, but I'm not. But I am loving the short pixie cut and the curls have grown on me. Courtney has guided me with how to style the curls and what products to use. I've always loved short hair so it has not been a challenge for me. I've actually had two haircuts and keeping it this length for a bit. My biggest complaint was the black and gray hair 🤮. So as soon as I got the okay from my oncologist at Vanderbilt I made a trip to Sally's for my color!!!!!
So hang in there all that have lost their hair! Drop a comment below with your hair stories or jump on over to the Facebook page and share there!
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